28 April 2007
My plane touched down at 9 p.m. yesterday and I rushed over to Bellagio to
find that I had missed the final table of the tournament. I wandered over to the
poker room and saw some familiar faces I’d played with before, but nobody I
really knew. So I called it a night and headed over to my hotel.
Got up today and found I had forgotten to pack any shoes. What can I say? I’m retarded. So a quick stop at Payless and I was off to Binion’s. The parking garages downtown are creepy. Tip for all you single women traveling alone: use the valet downtown. I took my mind off the fact that I was probably going to get myself raped or robbed waiting for the elevator to arrive by snapping pictures of the beautiful view from Binion‘s parking garage.
I played the highest limit game they had running at Binion’s on a Saturday …
4-8 Hold’em. WTF?!? Ah, I didn’t mind. I’ve been on a horrible losing streak for
about six months now. Did I just say six months? Am I the only one delusional
enough to believe that a losing streak could last six months? Perhaps I need to
reevaluate my game.
I love downtown Vegas. That’s my sort of atmosphere. I fit in there so much
better than on the snooty strip properties. Plus, it’s cheaper.
And I love cheap. Speaking of cheap, I had to have one of those 99¢
shrimp cocktails at the Golden Gate.
Of course, there are some things downtown you couldn’t pay me to eat.
Can you say “heart attack waiting to happen”? Do they give you a
free ride to the hospital with one of those? Deep fried twinkies, served with a
side of nitroglycerine. I wanted a treat, so I was going for the somewhat
healthier option of a chocolate banana. But the bastards sold out before I
arrived. Communist bastards. It’s a plot. They’re trying to keep the chocolate
from the Mouse.
29 April 2007
Ladies tournament at Ceasar’s … THAT SUCKED!!! I had to lay down pocket kings when one of my opponents spiked a third queen. I had to lay down two sets (TWO!), the first to a flush and the second to a straight. How did I get knocked out? My three kings lost to a flush on the river. I won one pot the whole two and a half hours I played … but it was only a blind steal! Where’s the fucking chocolate?
Anybody out there got an entrepreneurial spirit? I’m telling you, set up a
chocolate booth close to the tournament area on the day of the ladies’ event.
You’ll make a mint. Since nobody but me realizes this, I wandered into the
forum shops in search of chocolate. I know the chocolate shop at the Bellagio--believe
me, I know it well--but the new shoes I bought yesterday were ripping my feet
apart so I figured the less walking, the better. Of course, nobody told me that
Mrs. Smith’s special ed class designed the layout for the forum shops … I’m
looking around, I see no chocolate. Who buys this trendy-ass Prada bullshit
anyway? Bring on the chocolate.
Okay, so after wandering for a bit, I finally run across a directory. I
photographed it to prove it existed.
The directory tells me the chocolate shop is located on the first floor (casino level is the second floor). What information does the directory lack? Directions to the first floor, of course. No mention of stairs, escalator, or elevator. I tried to ask the Pegasus, but he just brayed. Typical male, less than unhelpful.
But I’m determined … so I go straight. I’m wandering by these shops, and I
can’t help but think, “I don’t remember a Gap in ancient Rome”. Am I the only
one that thinks these stores clash with the motif? I mean, you have Roman
statues illuminated by a Cheesecake Factory sign. FAO Schwartz has a faux Trojan
Horse at its e
ntrance.
Don’t go to Rome, we’ll bring it to you … via commercialism.
So I make it all the way to the back of the forum shops to find there’s no
way down. My feet are frickin’ bleeding at this point. You can’t have a first
floor with no access to it … so I backtrack and take the only path off the strip
I’ve been walking which, incidentally, is labeled by some ridiculously unhe
lpful
sign, such as “more restaurants this way, sucker”. Past the talking Bacchus, and
I find the stairs! Salvation! Chocolate is only minutes away …
Now this is accessible from Las Vegas Blvd. I’m providing a marker to the
entranc
e
for all you chocoholics.
I made it to the first floor! See, you can tell by how the perspective is pointing up towards the stairs.
And I walk all the way around the stairs, and I see …
Sigh of relief … and then I enter the shop. I don’t know what kind of freak
created this shop, but … oh, my god. I don’t want freakin’ chocolate covered
olives dipped in tea tree oil. What kind of new age bullshit is this??? Mint
julip and grounded tree bark mixed with dark chocolate … or whatever the fuck it
was they were trying to pass off as chocolate. AAAHHHH!!!! All this just to find
the fucking chocolate is inedible? Communist bastards! It’s a plot to keep me away from the chocolate! Pricks. My feet are bleeding, I’m in a
bad mood anyway … I felt like this:
I left, sans chocolate, and headed back to the poker room for some live action. I was amused, however, by the fact that the statue looks as if she’s feeling herself up as you ride the escalator up.
30 April 2007
First day of the championship event at Caesar’s. I, of course, was not playing in it because I’m poor and untalented. Bad combination. I donkeyed off more money than I care to admit in the 2-5 No Limit game. Yeah, it was a bad losing session. I was in the game for a whole half an hour and managed to drop two buy-ins in that time. I’m an idiot. So I switched to 4-8 where I took comparably longer to lose my buy-in. Every time I play live action at a Ceasar’s tournament, I lose. A lot of major names were in attendance, though. So that was kind of fun to watch everyone while I lost my money. Okay, I have to try to do some monetary damage control tomorrow. Maybe I won’t play at Caesar’s.
1 May 2007
2-5 No limit at Bellagio. Yay! I made back three-fifths of the money I’ve lost over the past two days. Plus, I got to see Doyle Brunson playing in the big game J
2 May 2007
OK, today just sucked … in a big way. In a major big way. I played for the first time at the Wynn. Only for an hour, of course, because in that time I managed to lose a whole buy-in with some guy making bad calls to suck out on me. I know you’re supposed to stay in the game whenever one of “those guys” is in the game, but they just keep getting lucky whenever I do that. So I left and went to Bellagio where I proceeded to lose another buy-in and a half. This just wasn’t my day.
So now let’s compare the Bellagio and the Wynn, bearing in mind that I routinely play at the Bellagio when I’m in town and I’ve only played at the Wynn once (for an hour). The staff is definitely nicer at the Wynn--everyone I spoke to there was so nice and helpful. The staff is often nice at the Bellagio, but a few times I’ve found their demeanor to be terse. The Wynn pays you a dollar an hour to play there. I’ve still never gotten a single comp from the Bellagio (see my review of the room). So, I should say the Wynn is better. But the truth is I feel more comfortable at Bellagio. Oh, well, I don’t need comps anyway.
3 May 2007
Went downtown and played low limit at the Golden Nugget. First time to play there … and I loved it! The staff is so nice and the place makes you feel so at home. Well, I said before that downtown Vegas is more my style than the strip, and I enjoy more the type of people that hang out downtown than the type of people that can be found in the strip properties. Plus, just play a few hours and ask for a comp … they’ll give you $10 off the buffet or the snack shop. Did I mention that I’ve still never gotten a comp from Bellagio? Anyway, I highly recommend playing there … I just wish they had bigger games. After a few hours and a trip to the buffet, I headed over to Bellagio and had a totally kick ass session of 2-5 no limit. I’m still behind overall for the trip, though.
4 May 2007
3-6 limit at the Mirage. I don’t think I’ve ever sat an easier table in my life, and bear in mind that I’ve played 1-2 limit in Florida. Seriously, it might’ve been a fluke since it’s just before tournament time, but I’d suggest checking it out if you are looking for low limit action in Vegas. I was told I could ask for a comp after about 4 hours of play. Since I only played 3 hours, I didn’t ask … but I’ll play longer next time I’m there and see what happens. I might also try 2-5 there next time and tell you guys what happened. The 3-6 game had a total cutie, though--a dealer from the Sahara who was a lot of fun to play with. I love having people with personality at my table. After the Mirage, I headed back to the Bellagio and had another really nice session of 2-5 no limit. Even for the trip, except for my tournament entry fee. I leave tomorrow, but I have most of the day to play first. I’ll probably stick to Bellagio.
5 May 2007
Going home ahead for the trip after another kick-ass session at the Bellagio. I was really fortunate to sit down at a table with a lady (very sweet lady) who was an excellent player except for the fact that she had a really bad habit of paying bad prices for draws. That was really the only flaw in her game. She made great lay-downs when appropriate, she called with marginal hands when appropriate, but those draws ... it was fortunate for me, though, because I was usually the one she was drawing against, and I was always giving her the wrong price to draw at me. From the moment I sat down, I only increased in chips (mainly off of her).
I decided before I left that I should get something to eat. Considering how many hours I've played at Bellagio, I figured it was really time to get a comp from them. So I decided to track down the manager and ask for one. Turns out that the manager is hiding in a room behind the cage. I just went back there and asked ... no problem. Of course, the comp wouldn't pay for the buffet (in large part because it was a Saturday and Bellagio jacks up their buffet price to thirty bucks on a Saturday ... thirty bucks? They must be smokin' crack.) so I ate at the grill, which was completely covered by the comp. Guess I now have to update my review of Bellagio, since I finally got a comp from them.
I can't tell you how sad I am to leave, though. I love Vegas. It's my favorite place to go ...